This video
was shared by a friend a few days ago.
Even amidst all of Francis Chan’s humor, it was immediately convincting.
Guilty.
I want to be
radical, but I think I’ve been walking down that confabulated middle road that
really doesn’t exist. I’m not trying to
make an excuse, but being busy with school and other things does make it
difficult to live a radical life.
There are so
many things that take over my mind because I’m on a schedule to get things
accomplished. For example, I have a
final exam for three courses tomorrow afternoon, two new classes to start on
Tuesday, and a meeting Thursday afternoon, among other things. There is so much pressure to do everything
well. I don’t mean being perfect, but
just doing things well. If I don’t do
well on the exam, my final course grades will reflect it. If I am not prepared for lectures this week,
it will make it more difficult to catch up later.
I do frequently
struggle with not being able to give as much of my time to God as I want. It frustrates me often, but I really don’t
have a way to change my schedule at the moment without having some
consequence. In order to stay in school,
I must pass classes and the COMLEX exam in June. In order to pass, it is necessary to study
and learn the material. That means that
I have to spend time studying instead of doing what I want. However, I also know that all of this is for
the purpose to which God has called me and He will help me through this. Also, medical school is preparing me for
service to God through medicine, which makes it necessary.
It’s a bit
of a Catch-22. That’s why I feel like I
take the middle road at times. There are
days that I feel so close to God and spend much more time with him than
usual. Then there are days that are
spent studying or sitting in lecture a lot.
I haven’t quite figured out the whole being a radical in every aspect of
my life. Like most everything else, it
is a process. It’s a journey I am glad
to be on because I know I am walking with God.
I am still learning to let Him lead in everything . . . down the narrow
path.
